Jennifer Lawrence finds age-appropriate boyfriend
LOS ANGELES -- The Hollywood Reporter revealed on Tuesday that after years of dating lecherous older men, Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Lawrence has "finally found an age-appropriate boyfriend."
The trade publication published tabloid photos confirming that the 27-year-old Hunger Games star is currently canoodling comedian Aziz Ansari, who, at 34 years old, is a full century younger than Lawrence's former boyfriend, 148-year-old director Darren Aronofsky.
Lawrence reportedly left Aronofsky last month after starring in his latest movie Mother!, a film that has come under fire from human rights campaigners for being "more morally horrifying than Mein Kampf," "a cinematic crime against humanity worthy of prosecution at the Hague," and "really fucking bad," according to a recent United Nations report. In Mother!, Lawrence stars as the young abused wife of an ancient, psychopathic and physically repellant male artiste. Domestic violence activists criticized Aronofsky for subjecting Lawrence's character to unrelenting psychological and physical abuse – a choice Aronofsky defended as "high art," "boundary-breaking" and "autobiographical" in an interview with the Ringer's Sean Fennessey
Previously, Lawrence was romantically linked to a series of other distressingly old men, including Chris Martin, the 230-year-old ex-husband of GOOP founder Gwyneth Paltrow whose Wikipedia page claims he is the lead singer of "Coldplay," an obscure British rock band that music historians credit with "elevating white male blandness into commercially viable art." In his latest book, Caucasian Vampires in Pop Culture, New York Times music critic Jon Caramanica describes Coldplay as the "musical precursor to conscious uncoupling, an important sociological phenomenon premised on emotional exanguination."
